peek-a-boo

I miss i.ph!

Of all the blogs I’ve had I’d say this is the most user-friendly ever, next is tblog, then blogger.com, although blogger has already caught up into making their interface more user-friendly.

I’m actually thinking of resurrecting this blog or coming up with another one that  has a specific niche. i’ve created too many blogs out there all about my life that i find it too self serving. that’s why im thinking of coming up with a new blog. will let you know soon.

BER months

Can you believe how time flies??? Gee, I could still remember when hubby and I had a lunch date with my dad at Hap Chan in Market Market sometime last year. That was even sometime on the second quarter of 2006. I was very apprehensive since hubby will then be talking to my dad to ask his blessing, since we're planning to get married already. Lo and behold! in about a month's time, we will be celebrating our first anniversary as husband and wife and we have a handsome baby on the side.

Last year we had three deaths in the family - my mom's half sister, her half sister's husband and the wife of one of my uncles.  We were devastated with these deaths and were even surprised that my grandmother outlived them. To be honest we were even expecting my lola to leave us last year. But we were blessed with one more year to have her.

Going back, it is really surprising how fast time goes by. I am at a point in my life when I find myself saying "sayang, i should have done this". Apparently, my cousin - kuya randy - was right when he said you can recover lost money, mend broken hearts and take back a lot of things, but you can never bring back time. I'm sure most of you will agree on that. Now looking at my son, I wish I've done a lot of things that I didn't in the past either because I'm too lazy or I just don't feel like doing at that time. Like being more responsible in school and taking a different career path that way I'd be home during day time and have more waking hours with my son. But then again, it's never too late as they say.

I do not want any more regrets.  What am I going to do? As of now I am still clueless. Well career-wise that is. My aunt and uncle in the states are offering to send me back to school to take up nursing. There are different job referrals from friends as well. But then again, I'm plugging into the Source of all good things. I think more than anything, I need to re-focus on the center of it all - the Lord. I will wait on the Lord for guidance and direction.

Going back to the BER months - next month, my husband and I will not only be celebrating our birthdays and our first year anniversary, but we will also be celebrating the dedication of our son. No details yet, as that is a faith goal since we are still praying for the Lord's provision.

I think that'll be all for now. Need to do A LOT of things.  Hope to blog again soon. Thanks for still visiting my blog friends. 

Lucia - In memoriam

She made my childhood more memorable and a lot happier with her visits. I know she spoils me with treats whenever she and my grandfather would visit and stay with us for a few days. Likewise, she loves telling me stories of the war and how her life was as a child, a wife and a mother of eight. She loves tucking me to bed and stroking my hair while I ask her to tell me her stories despite the fact that I've heard them so many times.  There wasn't a time when she told me I'm her favorite as well as my brother among her MANY grandchildren, but we just know. During Christmas morning, when we'd go to their house to kiss her hand and ask for our "aguinaldo", she will secretly give me and my brother a hundred pesos each while the rest of our cousins will get ten or twenty pesos. =)

I was already working the last time she stayed with us. I was then staying with my mom in Makati and mom picked lola up to spend a week with us. Now that was really memorable. As my relatives and close friends know that I cannot go to bed without taking a shower. That time, I was way too sleepy to dry my hair and so I went to sleep right away.  Lola woke me up and gave me a sermon, telling me I shouldn't sleep till my hair is dry. So I obliged and tried drying my hair using the fan. When I saw that my grandmother is already asleep, I then went back to bed - which I was sharing with her then, and went right back to sleep. A few minutes after, when I'm already half asleep, I felt lola feeling my hair to find out if I did dry my hair. Of course she went berserk when she found out my hair just half dry. So she woke me up again and this time I got a longer sermon to which my mom and I were laughing about the morning after.

Yesterday, we were told that she's passed away already. My mom went to visit her sometime after I gave birth. She told me that lola might not finish this year. I was then planning to visit her on her birthday - Sept 16. It will be Nathan's second month and we're thinking of cooking up a little feast to celebrate lola' s birthday and Nathan's second month. Sadly, she wasn't able to wait for it. She never saw my little boy. I'm trying not to cry as I continue this entry. I've already accepted the fact that she will be leaving us sometime this year. But I really wanted her to see my baby before she goes. We do not want to bring the baby anywhere (except of course for his check ups and shots) till he's at least 2 months old. That's why I'm thinking it would have been perfect to celebrate his second month with lola's 84th birthday. Unfortunately, she wasn't able to hold on long enough. My mom was crying over the same thing yesterday. It means so much to her to bring Nathan to lola, since Nathan is her (my mom) first grand child. And it broke my heart even more when I saw my mom weeping.

My grandmother lived a full life. She was blessed with eight children and a lot of grandchildren (don't ask me cause I don't know how many hehe) and great grand children. She is a beautiful woman inside and out, a woman of great faith in the Lord.  She has touched a lot of lives by sharing a piece of herself to them, be it a kind word, a laugh or a helping hand, one time she even raised a child (one of her daughters-in-law's niece) who used to be ill and unable to walk, but the child lived and was able to walk and is now in London. And I know that the lives of those people she came across with were never the same. 

My last picture with lola, taken on February 3, 2007. With us in the picture is my cousin Crystal.  

  Me, my mom, lola, Crystal and tita Teresita

To my Lola,

Thank you for enriching my childhood with lots of loving memories. You will always be my favorite lola. I'm deeply sorry I was not able to visit you soon enough after I gave birth. I wished that I had the chance to kiss and embrace you one last time. Thank you for everything. I promise that I will be a good daughter to my parents, a faithful wife to my husband and a loving mother to my son. And in the future when the Lord blesses me with grandchildren, I will be the kind of grand mother that you were to me, the kind that brings light in this dark and cruel world. 

Goodbye Lola. I love you.

Lucia, a 2-syllable girl's name of Latin origin, means: Bringer of light. 

Lucia C. Punay
September 16, 1923 - August 27, 2007

kirby

i have always wanted to post a new entry about how motherhood gave my life a 180-degree turn and how my son is such a joy to us. Somehow, my laziness almost always gets in the way. Sadly, I am posting a different entry today. I'm blogging now to remember a friend, to celebrate his life and to mourn his death. I met Kirby when they (him, Cassandra and Kami) helped us pioneer a new department - cyber response (email support) in our campaign. He is a kind-hearted guy with a great sense of humor. He is definitely one of our favorite red hats (term used for expats sent here to pioneer a campaign), he's always ready to give a helping hand, be it with how to resolve a difficult customer complaint, how to properly disposition the emails or just how pull a prank on one of our colleagues. One time he went to one of our operations manager's cubicle and trashed all the shred papers inside his lateral. The other time, he did kidnap the other ops manager's favorite doll (hello kitty), and placed a couple of ads that kitty is missing. In line with that, he sent an email to the ops manager giving a list of things they - the kidnappers wanted as ransom for kitty. I do not remember the exact things they had on the list, but i do remember one of it was a pack of pastillas de leche among some other pinoy sweets. Before they left for the US, they gave back kitty along with a scrap book of kitty's travels together with his kidnappers. Those were just one of the things that he did to make everyone laugh.

Last week I received an email from Kami informing us that he was air lifted to salt lake city hospital for his surgery. and he was put on a medically induced coma to prevent his lungs and kidneys from failing. Unfortunately the doctors tried to bring him out of coma several times. And yesterday, the life support has been turned off. He will surely be missed.

heLLo WoRLd!!!

been a long time! i miss blogging.

well as for the title im sure you can tell that i gave birth already. gave birth last july 16 at 1:15pm after 10hrs of labor pains. and it was all worth it when i saw my little boy. what i find truly amazing was when the head nurse brought him to me for me to kiss him after he got cleaned up. he was wailing but when i said "hello nathan", he immediately stopped crying.

here are the much awaited pictures.

i so love that shirt that his ninang carmi gave him. will blog again next time folks. hope to visit your blogs real soon.

bored

okay, so my moments of "pag-iinarte" is over. I guess that's what boredom does to someone used to working. add to that the fact that i'm overly possessive. on that i shall not further elaborate. bottom line, i did misinterpret some things and blew things out of proportion. thus, i drove my husband crazy. nonetheless, it did touch my heart when my own dad reprimanded me telling me that hubby called him crying and asking where to find me and what to do.

i failed to mention that i was on a 2 weeks complete bed rest due to the fact that my cervix is already opening up and there is a high probability of me giving birth prematurely. good thing hubby got me something to do - cross stitch! reminds me of my good ol' high school days.

pardon me for being so lazy in answering your tags. i will, dont worry.

forlorn

i wrote this a couple of days before i turned 26. I was kinda hoping that that "feeling" will no longer haunt me after I turn 26 and after the day I turn 26. But boy was I wrong.

Left in the company of the four corners of our bed chamber for a week and for another next week, the internet is my only entertainment. But then again, sometimes too much curiousity causes one to stumble upon things best unknown.

Trying to forget what I saw a couple of hours ago, I decided to browse thru friend's blogs wishing there'd be snippets to clue me in what's going on with their lives as of late. I got to Honey's page and I saw what she wrote for me sometime last year. For online friends who knew my old urls, you might have had the chance to read Ever after in one of my entries. I'm  posting my entry here to refresh your memory and for my new friends to read thru the beauty of the said article.

Sunday, April 23, 2006

.:.MiRRoR of mY heArt.:.

We were merely people who work for the same company; she was a familiar face, mostly to be seen outside during fifteen minute breaks, indulging her cancer cells, while I, a reformed nicotine-dependent (ehem ehem six months na po! Bow), would simply go out to savor the company of friends who are still into the habit.

Ever After

honey 4/20

I was desperately trying to hold back my tears and when I finished her entry. And when I looked at her, I knew she understood completely, she just showed me a mirror of my heart. She didn’t say another word, she just smiled and we walked out of the room - I, to go home after a long tiring day, she on the other hand, to feed her cancer cells once again.

What could have happened, had I refused to respond to those text messages and missed calls that registered on my phone last December of 2005? What if I changed my mobile number back then? What if I waited for God's perfect will? I know there is no way I'll ever find out and perhaps even if God will show me what life would've been had I waited, I will just feel terribly miserable.

Gee this is not even post partum!

tagged =)

been rather off the blogging world as of late. not because of work or anything but due to plain laziness. haha anyway, my blog assignments have piled up and i think i ought to start accomplishing them before i get tagged again. as of the moment, i've already been tagged twice. well make it three, the first one, i actually requested. hehe so to annamanila, here are my answers to your questions. 

1. Your beautiful baby boy has just been placed on your throbbing bosom. What will be the first thing you will tell him (as you know he would surely understand, the newborn that he is). 

- I really do not how its going to be when i first hold him in my arms. I guess I'd be kissing his chubby cheeks while I utter a prayer of thanksgiving because the Lord entrusted me with something so precious.

2. There is time for everything and for everything there's a season. How would you call or name or describe this very season you ae exeriencing right now.

- Right now my husband and I are experiencing a season of waiting. Everything seems to be on hold. We're waiting for God's word on a lot of things. It seems that God will reveal his will to us, (career wise, financial and spiritual) all together once the baby comes out. 

3. As you choose your baby's name, you also decide to choose a second name for yourself — what will these two names be?

- The baby's first name is Paul, we wanted to pick a name that's biblical. My husband wanted to go for the name Peter but Peter has been rebuked by Jesus several times and I feel that Paul's testimony is more inspiring. Thus the name Paul. I'm not quite sure about picking a second name for myself so I guess I wont be able to answer that. hehe

4. Summer is scorching for all of us here in Pinas. How much more was it for a lady 6-7 months preggie. How did you cope?

- There is only one way we know how. hehe My husband has no choice but to spoil me and keep the air-conditioner day in and day out. The only down side to it is the sky-rocketing electric bill monthly. hehe 

5. The grass is greener at the other side of the fence. By same token, the fish that got away also seem fatter. Myth/illusion both — don't you think?

- I used to believe that, and sometimes I'm still tempted to think of it that way. But carrying this child in my womb, I'm actually glad that some people got away.

Well  that is the first tag i will answer, it sure is fun since the questions were very personalized. I will give you guys a chance to be interviewed as well..

Interview rules:1. Leave me a comment saying "Interview me."2. I will respond by emailing you five questions. I get to pick the questions.3. You will update your blog with the answers to the questions.4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someonelse in the same post.5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.

sneak peak

To annamanila, I know I promised to answer the questions for the interview me blog entry yesterday. Sorry about that. I will do so on my next entry. This is to give way to the much awaited blog entry. Please check out our pretty boy's first ever photo shoot. We already have a name for the little guy, but will announce it when he's born. Anyway, enjoy the pics. Golly! I can't get over how cute and he is.

Shy baby

Handsome with a capital H

Chubby cheeks

Sleepyhead

Wanna use the phone this early baby?

Gazing at our baby’s face

Last week we had the 3d/4d ultrasound at the Medical City. It was morning of the 1st of June, and I was accompanied by my dad and brother going to the hospital, while hubby met me there since he came from shift. While at the waiting area on the women's health care department, we saw several posters that has information concerning different types of ultrasound. As for 3d/4d ultrasound, it says that it may not always be successful, in terms of capturing the baby's image, since it will entirely depend on the baby's position. If the baby is not in a good position, then parents are requested to come back after an hour or two to try again. However, if by then, the baby still refuses to show his face, then you will be requested to come back another time. That is because any additional trial will be harmful for the baby. Upon reading that I immediately prayed that our little boy would be in the mood to have his very first photo shoot.

We got there 9am. I was already lying in the bed, then the OB introduced herself to me. They were about to call hubby when she saw my referral slip (my OB is from UST, but since the 4d ultrasound machine that UST bought is not of good quality, they had it shipped back to be exchanged for  better machine. Thus we were referred to Medical city which is so much closer to home) and saw that my OB requested a different OB to do the ultrasound for me. I was ready to go through the entire process and downright excited that I was about to tell her its okay. But then again, before I opened my mouth to coax her to proceed, she said she needs to follow my OB's request and that my OB (Dra. Decena), was her professor in UST Med School. So I had no other choice but to go ahead and stand up and go back to the waiting area and join my already sleepy hubby, dad and bro.

The doctor we were referred to arrived a few minutes after 10am. Shortly after she arrived, I was called in. She then asked me to lie down and has already put that clear gel on my tummy, hubby was asked to come into the room and she went ahead and checked on our little boy. But she said she wanted to transfer to the other room where she has a better feel of the machine. So we did. When we got there, we were so excited to find out how our little boy looks like. He was either a bit shy at first or was purposely teasing us to build excitement as his feet and hands were covering his face. We talked to him telling him to let us gaze into his little face, and he obliged! He then removed his feet, then slowly he removed his right hand, and finally he removed his left hand and put it on the side of his face. The first thing that we saw is his nose. I've been praying really hard that he wont have a flat nose, and the Lord granted my request. Because the OB delightedly announced: "Wow ang tangos ng ilong!" His cheeks were so round, the doctor kept saying "What a beautiful baby! Very healthy." I could not find words to capture exactly how I felt the time I was seeing him moving. In the picture he even smiled for us, as if happy to be having his first ever picture taken. I looked at my husband, and he is a picture of a proud dad. His smile is from ear to ear.

We were given (4) four pictures. 3 of his head shots, while hubby requested that the OB take a picture of his genital area to brag about the fact that he is a boy. The doctor happily obliged and was even humorous to put 3 arrows pointing to the penis and the balls. And she typed in the words = "I'm a BOY!". We were ecstatic. Especially everytime the doctor kept on saying he's healthy and that there are no signs of any abnormality - down syndrome, hydrocephalus (dunno how to spell it) etc., and that everything is fine and dandy.

It took about 15 minutes and then we were told to go back for the result of the normal ultrasound (which we're suppose to show my OB the next day) after an hour and for the rest of the pictures and the CD after 7 business days.

My hubby is yet to take a picture of the 4d ultrasound. I've been pestering him for days already. He said he will on the weekend. So please pardon me, since we have yet to upload the picture then. But I definitely will upload it. hehe talk about a proud mama!