----Ecclesiastes 3:1
.:.fifty first blog.:.
October 27, 2006When I switched to the egoddess persona, I vowed to make that blog as the permanent blog I'd have for a long time. But when I saw this domain courtesy of a good friend, I decided to move right away, no second thoughts. I am grateful to my former host but I feel that this provider is so right for me. It's really love at first sight! hehehehe Aside from the obvious reasons, I also switched blog because the layout that you see personifies the new me. I actually surprised myself when I was going over the selection of the templates and graphics they have available, when I chose these stuffs that you now see. Over the years that I have been blogging, I always find myself gravitating towards selecting templates with not only dark but black backgrounds, and images reflecting an emptiness and a brokenness inside me that i have no name for. all the time! You may check out all my blogs just to find out.
this is the first and longest blog that I maintained but I changed it's url several times when I feel that some people were trying to get too personal. Here's a variant of that blog. If you'll check out the archive list on the bluerlyn url, you'll notice that there are months that I did not log an entry for the said blog, that was when I temporarily switched to another provider. Check it out. Then finally after bluerlyn, I changed persona to egoddess. The said blog was born out of a desire to become anonymous once again in the blogging world, but this time I feel that there is no need to hide anymore. I liked being egoddess for a while but I definitely like being aMgiNe! In a way going back to the original web nick I've grown accustomed to, is very significant of my personal life. I will no longer let other people's opinion of what I am and who I am, determine what I become. If my deceased paternal grandmother and grand aunt used to place me consistently on the spot of a second best well that's over. I don't have to live that part for the rest of my life. Things have to change. It's water under the bridge now and I have already forgiven them. Time's a changing. The little girl in me will play and laugh again. I have repressed her for too long. But now people will once again hear echoes of her giggles and laughters.
I used to have a secret blog in order to vent out, to freely lambast people i am not at liberty to criticize out in the open, and mostly to document my laments over my relationship with my long time boyfriend, now turned husband. I was then playing a tug of war over my emotions. Loving and hating and hating and loving. I decided to chose one once and for all. I married him and he's given me the best gift he could ever give a woman he chooses to love - his name. We may have had difficulties in the past, mostly because of our own undoing, we had a lot of growing up to do. And now through God's grace we have turned a new chapter of our lives, as husband and wife.
This marks a new chapter in my life, in our life. I chose you to witness the unfolding of God's loving kindness to me and to my husband. I know that it will not be a smooth road ahead, I'm expecting to hit a few bumps along the way but we will go through it while holding on to God's hands.
rants
April 14, 2003Monday, April 14, 2003
hi there, still 4 and 1/2 hours before log-out, which reminds me that i wont be able to go home yet coz i still need to render overtime that way i could finish the error track. hmmm….i'm soooo stressed out! =( i need to have a break…. i'm looking forward to the outing our training team will have, that would be in Batangas. good thing baby will be joining me, wish ko lang di sya ma out of place kasi si yen di pupunta nasasayangan sa money uwi na lang daw syang bukidnon to visit her kid, now si rey naman di sasama coz he is going to israel to meet his boyfriend there, that's going to be his bf's treat for him for his birthday, well anyway, dyan naman sila maite eh and kasundo naman nya sila ron at sila jun eh, sana lang wag na sumama si kupal Ge! oks na to the max un pag walang mga super kupal, enjoy na kami ng baby ko nun.
i wonder what we're going to do for our 3rd anniversary? hmmm….. o well sana naman its going to be heartwarming for both of us, well that's actually not the right term, what i actually mean to say is that i want it to be really special for both of us, for us to be able to bond with each other. sana we could go to punta fuego, i checked it out in the web eh super ganda!!! kaya lang maganda din ata ang presyo~ngeks asa pa ko, malamang di ba?!
multiple entries
April 13, 2003hi there, it's a Sunday evening and yes i'm working here at the office… =( well at least i'm off for tomorrow. wala pa ding internet sa longue kakainis tuloy di pa din ako makapag upload ng mga kung anu-anong mapagkakatuwaan dito sa aking bagong panganak na blog.
this morning alam mo ba na muntik ko pang mawala ang wallet ko. nung pauwi na kami ni yen, since nagmamadali na kami pumunta sa mcdo, di na kami dito nag restroom, dami kasing mga tao eh, dun na kami nag restroom sa 2/f. and just you know what? when we got to mcdo, goodness gracious!!! i was about to order but when i checked my bag josme! wala ang wallet ko! buti na lang di pa ko umo-order!!! balik kami ni yen, lakas talaga ng kutob ko na di ko dito sa office namin naiwan kundi sa 2/f. buti na lang wala pang pumapasok dun sa restroom, from time to time kasi may mga guards na nagche-check eh. then yen and i went na lang to cubao since ayaw na namin both na maglakad na naman all the way to mcdo here, layo kasi! dun din kami sa mcdo bumagsak. we had breakfast kwentuhan galore, miss ko na nga yun eh, she's like my bestfriend in our training team. then we talked about going abroad. yen is a single parent eh, so she really needs to work hard coz her kid is growing up na. napag-usapan nga namin dati na we both want to work in a luxury liner cruise ship, kasi one of our co-worker previously worked for a luxury liner. actually maganda kasi di naman sya talaga yung matagal kang naglalayag sa karagatan dahil nga mga cruise lang so mga 10 days lang then balik na naman sa land. tapos syempre wala pang gastos, libre ung food, ung tutuluyan kasi most of the time naman dun naman kami sa barko, tapos tax free pa ung income. gusto ko na talaga umalis….
then dun nga ko umuwi kina babe, we talked about work. i slept but i woke up around 3pm due to excessive heat, summer is really here, undoubtedly! then i asked babe to go upstairs we had a little lovin', then afterwards we had a chat and i told him about the abroad thing. we had a discussion, as in! it was a loooonnng discussion, a really depressing one, but bottom line is we love each other so much but we both have our own lives to live and we both have our own dreams to pursue. now we will just have to live one day at a time…..
@ 11:27 PM
first ever entry
April 12, 2003Saturday, April 12, 2003
i have always kept a journal since time immemorial….in fact i without counting the diaries i have way back elementary… only the ones i have from high school, i already have 10 journals, the latest was given to me by mah baby! =) I have always wanted to have journals for posterity purposes, and mostly to just scribble my thoughts when there isn't anyone who'd listen, or when i have a deep dark secret. but lately it's becoming more and more difficult to find time to actually sit down and write down all my thoughts, so in my attempt to make journal entries a non-tedious task, i found blogger.com, hope i could make this work..eRLyN
